It's been a long time since I've posted on this blog, largely because I was able to get a couple of weeks of full time work as an in-home child-caregiver for a superwoman who is both a single mum and an essential worker. (: I spent most of my energy hanging out with two of the coolest little boys, so when I got home, there was barely enough left to keep up with my study and wedding planning, let along writing blog posts. I spent a lot of time collapsed on the couch next to Simon consuming Star Trek Enterprise like the soul medicine it is.
When I last wrote, I was in a state where I felt depressed - just for a couple of days, as a reaction both to the lockdown and to the havoc this has wrecked on my wedding plans. It's not really even that I'm upset by the idea of the wedding turning out any particular way, but it's more my reaction to the stress and pressure of not only having to meet the expectations of two families in organising this event, but having to change plans so many times, and build plans that can adapt to the constantly changing scope of pandemic.
On that note, if you make a plan A, and a plan B, but then something comes along that should go between them, does it become the plan B and the previous plan B become plan C, or does it become plan A.1? Well, I'm waiting on the government announcement today to hear whether my current plan A.2 is likely to be allowed if New Zealand is at level 2 in our pandemic response by that time, or whether I'll have to go on to plan A.3 and 4, which I've vaguely given thought to.
So, here's what seems to be going on with our wedding plans:
Plan A:
Our original plan, before the pandemic started, was to have a wedding with an invite list of around 150 people in Christchurch in July.
Plan A.1
One of New Zealand's first responses to the pandemic, during what was then called 'Alert level 2' was to ban non-essential gatherings of 100 people or more. Plan A.1 was to have a wedding with 99 people (Including bride and groom and any vendors present at one time) in Christchurch in July.
Plan A.2
Due to concerns about family members with health conditions, and the general spread of our guests, we have realised that it will be better for most people if we hold our wedding in Wellington, as most of our families live in the lower North Island and will be able to drive there. However, while it makes it easier for family to attend, the people we interact with day-to-day are in Christchurch, so we are planning a second celebration in Christchurch in order to celebrate with these people. We are hoping that this wellington wedding will be allowed to go ahead with 99 people, but if not,
Plan A.3
In the event that we are only allowed a gathering of less than 99, say less than 50, we will have to choose a group of close family and wedding party members, to attend the ceremony, and would have to ask others to watch the ceremony over a weblink. In this case, if we are able, we may split our guest count into two receptions, perhaps an afternoon tea and a dinner.
Realistically, if there were enough of a risk of COVID 19 in New Zealand for us to need to have 2 receptions, we would need to think seriously about whether it was responsible to hold such an event, however, for now, it remains an option to think about.
Plan B.
Even at Alert levels 3 &4, it is legal to have a wedding in New Zealand provided no more than 10 people are present, and no food is served. If this is the case, we will endeavour to have both sets of our parents present in Wellington, and will have a celebration for our wider friends and family at a later date. While we will be saddened if we cannot have all our friends and family celebrating with us, don't feel to bad for us, no matter what, I get to marry my best friend. Who knows, maybe we can have a drive-by reception, like these couples.
This one's not on You Tube so I can't make it display on the blog post, but I promise it's worth clicking on:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/video-shows-small-wedding-reception-outside-of-washington-dc-church/vi-BB12137N
So, you see, I just watched Jamie Wolfer's video on when to book vendors and I have to laugh.
This one's not on You Tube so I can't make it display on the blog post, but I promise it's worth clicking on:
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/video-shows-small-wedding-reception-outside-of-washington-dc-church/vi-BB12137N
So, you see, I just watched Jamie Wolfer's video on when to book vendors and I have to laugh.
Book your venue 9 months in advance? Well, I tried. Now I have less than 3 months, and nothing is booked. The situation is made more chaotic by the reality that at this stage, we don't know when we will know what we will be able to do come July. Nothing can be set in stone. For every option I explore, I am ensuring it is refundable or at least transferrable. The thing is, I don't even know what is up with my wedding. But, God does. I go through stages, but I am not upset or anxious about this today. I am excited. This is an adventure, as is marriage. Not everything can go your way, even if you are planning a wedding in the best of times. While I absolutely reserve the right to feel upset for a time when things don't go my way, I know that whatever happens, my wedding will only last for one day. So if it's great, I'll have a great day. If it's terrible, at least the next morning, I'll wake up next to my sweetheart. I can't wait to see how it's going to turn out.
